Spirituality...

Many people from the 'west' come to India seeking 'spirituality.'

My discoveries along the spiritual path has also been interesting. As always, the values are easy to grasp but very challenging to make them an integral part of one's day to day life. My sincere attempts to do so has SO FAR brought me to a stage where I do not think I can successfully implement each one of them every time because the larger society, norms and templates of right/wrong, good/bad are all wired differently - most often conflicting.

Ironically, a few days ago, I realized that it seems to be relatively easier FOR ME to implement these values in an 'alien' and 'western' country that I live in right now. Strange eh?

• Accept people as they are: It's fascinating that India is such a diverse country but I do not believe there is a national identity to it. In my opinion its also a very divided country. Being married into a totally different internal culture shocked me more of our differences, prejudices than my first experience of being out of my country. These divisions are used and deepened by people with vested interests - so much that the country spends more time discussing differences than similarities and how to bond.

• In contrary, in Germany, my work place has hundreds of different nationalities working together. I have colleagues and friends from different countries and religions. I like them all and there are stronger bonds I feel (despite our differences) than I feel towards some of my fellow Indians.

• Its sadly only a few very special friends back home with who I feel bonded - interestingly, only few are of a similar background as me :)

• Saying "try" causes stress: In India, 'try' is the operating word because it sounds polite. In Germany it's highly appreciated to be honest and give a clear 'yes/no' when its possible.

• Don't be a football to other's opinion: In India, you have to be ready to be labelled as a rebel and many other things to follow this approach. "What will people say/think" is what drives very many decisions.

• In Germany, 'its okay to have one's personal perspective and take a stand.'

"You think more money, bigger house, bigger car is success? Without knowing what success is, everyone wants to be successful," Sri Sri Ravishanker.

I personally never considered this to be the definition of success for me. But many of my friends in India do define this as success.
On contrary, I know people and some of my friends in Germany are the ones who do not. E.g. some do not have a television at home - not because they cannot afford it. But because they choose not to have it. Their success is not defined by the large TV in the living room. Many choose to work less - thereby earn less salary to pursue a hobby that they are passionate about.

Ironically many people like me are termed 'westernized' by my fellow Indians. But looks like some of the westerners are closer (at least at face value) to the spiritual values that are preached in the Spiritual Land of India...

Interesting inter-connections...

Aspirations

Many Indian politicians promise to make Indian cities like, Singapore/Toronto/Shanghai…the inspirations are many. Usually broken promises. Majority of the Indian population always expect the government to bring about this transformation. For political parties its an agenda item. But for resident citizens it's a day to day lifestyle issue and often their role and participation is often not spoken about enough.

Indians made the choice in the last elections – towards ‘development’ –aspiring to lead the lifestyle of the ‘developed’ world. I observe that people often do not realize that behind the comfort and luxuries of the lifestyle of the developed world lie lots of regulations, compliance, adherence trust and most importantly civic responsibilities – which in my view a lot of Indians are not willing to take on themselves. As it will be seen as “loss of freedom.” Example:

• -       In Germany, Sundays are ‘quiet days.’ People are expected to be considerate towards their neighbors and not do things that would disturb. (Indian’s perspective) “I can’t be loud in a common place in my apartment building because of the neighbors? I pay rent for living here. I will do what I want in my house.”
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• -       People refrain from throwing personal garbage (coffee cups, chips packets etc.) on the streets. There are bins provided. (Indian’s perspective) “It’s the job of the government to clean the streets and pick the garbage (I throw).”
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• -       Garbage is an important topic in Europe in varying degrees. There are colored boxes for different types of garbage, there are different collectors – some only available on appointment – this ensures the right type of waste is handled the right way and potentially recycled the right way. Thereby ensuring reduced damage to the natural resources – The result of which – clean air, exceptionally clean water are enjoyed by everyone. (Indian’s response) “Oh its such a hassle. You need to pay for garbage disposal?”
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• -       Safety regulations are also very important in Europe. Neglecting them could have impacts on insurance coverage etc. (Indian’s response) “Seat belts to sit at the backseat?” :-O – Oh. It’s too tight. I can’t move. What a pain.”
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• -       There are regulations on what style to follow for buildings in specific areas, including the types of plants that can be planted, the color of the roof, the color of the satellite dish etc. This is what results in the ‘uniform’ aesthetics that makes that perfect postcards pictures of quaint European towns admired by visitors. (Indian response) “I am paying for my house. I will build it the way I want.”  

Corruption at the governance level is definitely not to be excused or justified. However, in many instances there are clear guidelines, processes and guidelines. All it requires is patience, compliance and honesty. People in India seem to forget that in a democracy the only job of a citizen isn’t that of voting, it’s also being a responsible citizen. Indian citizens residing in India are often quick to point fingers at the likes of us non-resident Indians for not contributing to the success of the country. I’d like to ask, “How responsibly are you performing the duties of being a resident citizen?”

Expat life

As I spend more time here and get insights beyond the obvious of the different aspects of systems, processes, cultures in Germany, I realize it has its own set of prejudices, judgements, rigidities and hypocrisies.

I then realized that I really like living the life of an expat because it allows me to be away from these aspects of my own culture and I can also stay relatively away from those of the country of residence. While being neither here nor there has its negatives, this is perhaps the positive side of it.

I will always be an outsider (everywhere) to be pulled into the depths of the society. Nobody will really care to do so and this makes it easier for me to leave these complexities, move on and focus on more important things in life.

Anyway, populist societal believes are always too black and white, judgmental and templatized while the greater part of life are different shades of gray, uncertain, relative and contextual.  

Media reach

Earlier this week, I surprised myself about my ability to converse in German with a group of elderly Austrians about critical issues faced in India - the new Prime Minister, safety of women in India etc.

While it was no surprise to me that every one knew about the recent elections and the new Prime Minister - his 'hindu bias', I was extremely surprised to learn that this group even knew about the recent rape case in Badaun. While rape in India is now a global news item, I wasn't aware that every such incident was reaching a global audience. This group was aware of the details of this case...

Over the course of the discussion, it struck me that the caste issues associated to this might be the reason this news piece made it international - to reassure the world that India is still ridden with this problem.

These conversations played in my mind long after they were over. Perspectives on the way the world views India is always interesting to me.

Its ironic that given India (so far) functions largely despite the governance, Indians love talking, debating, arguing about their Political points of views. It takes almost nothing to get Indians started on this topic.

In the years I have spent in Germany, rarely have I been caught in a charged up discussion about the different parties, personal preferences, opinions...All that I know about the political parties are mainly through feeding my own curiosity and some light hearted conversations over lunch.
This could be because I am not a local, people might believe I don't know enough to include me in the conversations. But we Indians don't seem to care. We subject everyone to our individual preferences about the politicians, political parties...while the audience sits and observes a fierce debate :D

I was conversing with Austrians about Indian politics. I had absolutely NO clue about Austrian politics. So does India for its exotic and uniqueness get covered more in the International news?
Sure India is an emerging economy. But so is Brazil, South Africa, Russia...what makes media talk more about India (e.g. BBC, Al Jazeera) compared to others?

I wonder...

Inspiration

Starting spring all through good weather days, this old lady religiously comes to work on her piece of land behind our apartment - tiling, planting, weeding, cutting, watering...she spends many hours there and it seems like its something she enjoys. 

People her age back in India rarely do anything that they enjoy at a personal level. They would rarely do anything that involves as much physical effort. The mentality would be that of life coming to an end...

From the way she walks, I can tell she perhaps has troubles with her knees and even her back, yet she does all this back breaking work, all by herself. She inspires me - to be like her when I am that age - find the joy in doing things that interests me...do everything in my control to physically be in a position to do so.

There is often a strange sense of pleasure every time I see her driving up her car to the piece of land, to see her going about her work. I look forward to seeing her :)

How context matters

Sitting in a country that has a crazy history thanks to one extremely crazy man and his bunch of crazy people, I watch the frenzy of fellow Indians towards one man during the 2014 elections, I cannot not think how dangerous this sort of frenzy could become...

In the time I have spent in Germany, I have had a lot of exposure via different sources about its history. How it all started - it all made a lot of sense when it started and the world knows how it all eventually turned out. This is the history which many would like to forget but at the same time its important to remember so such things do not get repeated. 

India is the world's largest democracy. Our older generation went through a lot, fought hard to make the country one. It is also incidentally one of the young countries in the world. Agreed we are not where we could be and would like to be 1947 and hence. But in my opinion, the restless younger generation and those seeking the American dream in India are being a bit ignorant about facts that are important to be considered. 

• With events in 2008, it is quite clear that the American dream is not perfect. 
• The European model of a socialist flavored capitalism is also under a lot of stress. So in my eyes, there isn't any clear winner. 
• Unemployment is not a problem unique to India. It is even a problem in the developed world. Governments in the developed world are also struggling to find solutions for this. 
• A favorite comparison among many Indians is that to the progress made by China. Sure. All credits to China for their achievements. But they are not governed and ruled by the way we are. How would this bunch of youth in India feel if the Facebook and WhatsApp apps did not work on their smart phones? - Think we need to be careful what we wish for and not take our democracy for granted. 
• the governing years of the incumbent has definitely done a lot of harm to the country, but they were elected by the people of the country. So its not fair to project all those years as if they were ruled by some autocrats who refused to budge from their positions. The democratic process (however screwed it might have been) was followed all through.

I am all in favor of giving someone else a chance. 

Given the levels of transparency and corruption, I believe there is no way a common person will ever know the truth behind the riots in Gujrat. Yes, I also know that other parties are not clean of such acts. 

Horrible as it sounds, even if I choose to move on and give this person a chance to prove himself, I think it is important for all of us to be cautious. It is important to remind ourselves that ours is a large complex country with great disparities and one person wielding the stick isn't going to work. 

What India needs are large scale reforms in its policies. Which policies are priority? What changes are they standing for? E.g. 'Obamacare' was very talked about and known from the very beginning. 

Not much details are known about such topics and interestingly not many people are asking. In a talk show with this popular PM candidate, a woman, so enamored by this man that all she wanted to know what who his fashion designer is. Phew!! How would that affect her daily woes? 

I ask myself if I would have thought along these lines if I were not sitting in Germany - very aware of its past... sensing a weird, scary similarity of the rise of one man above his party and other parties...feeling uncomfortable. Uncomfortable because:

• ours is a parliamentary form of government, so it has always been electing a party over a person. In 2014 it doesn't seem so. 
• this person for some (including me) has a stamp of being a Hindu nationalist. I am a Hindu and I do not believe a diverse country like India can afford this
• this person talks about development in a very black and white manner with no emphasis on the sustainability aspects of them or the cost of such development. 
• the man has a reputation of having an authoritative style of leadership. Perception has it, that it worked in one state in the country. But the country is too diverse to be lead along the directions of one man and his definition of progress and development. (Even his own party members are not completely with him in some cases). Taking the entire nation forward in cooperation with warring local state governments is not an easy task. But there is no sense of humility about this humongous challenge. Instead it is arrogance that comes across as if the solutions are all lying in his desk...just waiting for the opportunity to come to power. 

The beauty of our democracy brought a complete newbie to become Chief Minister of our capital city. I hope the beauty of our democracy will also be sane enough to smell it when it is going in the wrong direction and not let one man rule supreme in our life. 

It is famously said, "a country gets the government it deserves." Huh! I wonder...

Identifying by my work

Unlike many parents in India, mine did not push me to be solely academic oriented. Academics were a necessary evil in my life that I needed to get through to survive in the system. I was much better and more oriented to extra-curriculars (sport, music etc).

While this helped me choose a relatively off-beat career like Design (when most peers were studying medicine, engineering, law etc), the system eventually caught up on me in one way - my work became part of my identity. This is further accentuated by the fact that Design also happens to be a an area that I am passionate about - very invested in.

I never noticed how much my work was my identity until now.

In Germany, work and private life has a very clear distinction - one of those cultural differences I found hard to deal with and understand initially but later began to respect.
I observed many friends and colleagues being very dedicated to their job during the hours they spent at work, yet would totally switch off the moment they stepped out and would be ready to wear a totally different hat - that of their hobby/ other interests.

With situations that are now more important to my life, I am beginning to wonder how I could move more in this direction. 

Being an outlier

When I lived in India, I constantly stood out amongst fellow urban, educated, upwardly mobile middle class Indians who always thought everything about the NEW, 'developing' India was great - India is the next super power, Indians are the most intelligent people, the world economy is alive due to India...the world is coming to India...
Not acknowledging the things that work well in the 'developed' world

Now, living as an expat in a 'developed' economy, I still stand out because the locals have the 'developed' world mindset - we invented this in the past, we are leaders in that...
Not acknowledging the growing role emerging economies are playing in the world.

*Sigh* its a hard life being someone with a broader perspective. While at my core I believe this is a good thing to be able to have a balanced view, there are definitely times when I wonder, if it is more peaceful to take a black and white approach to life and be on one side of the journey.